Friendship - How To Say Sorry

There are times when even the closest of friends experience a rift in their friendship. A rift can be caused by the misunderstanding of a situation. To bring the closeness back into the friendship, understanding of where it went wrong and saying sorry can bring the relationship back on track.

Distress

You have personal opinions and emotions and so do your friends. Even though you may spend a lot of time together doesn't mean that they know every thought and feeling or decision that you have or make. Most misunderstandings come about because of information that has not been shared.

Understanding the issue

You can't begin to make things right if you have not been told what the problem is. Real friends don't yell at their friends when misunderstandings happen. If boundaries have been crossed then either the boundary was not known or not considered a priority.

Saying sorry

A genuine apology comes from the heart and includes making any damage right. Taking responsibility for what you have done is a mature and responsible way to conduct yourself. If the issue involved saying something to your friends boy/girlfriend then this may need very delicate attention to put right. If the person you are apologising to does not want to hear it then wait until they have calmed down. This may be minutes, hours, days or even months depending on how angry they are.

Awareness

Consider carefully what it is that you are apologising for. Giving a generic apology and continuously repeating it has no meaning. You are apologising for causing distress or loss depending on the situation. The apology is not to get you off the hook. The apology is addressed to that part in your friend that is hurting and is in disharmony. Balance needs to be restored. Your friend may not have known how deeply they felt about this issue until someone else interfered.

Longevity

True reliable friends are hard to find. When things are upset between you the question of trust is raised. Having the understanding and maturity to say sorry goes a long way to restoring trust. Be the kind of friend that can recognise when issues have arisen and address them immediately. The faster the matter is restored to harmony the shorter the damage time.

When reflecting on years that have gone by and you can admit to your part in certain events that changed the status of your friendships it is never to late to say sorry and take responsibility for your roll in the event. It may be too late to make things right as the people concerned have moved on. If you have apologised then you have done your part in restoring balance.

If you would like to have a confidential chat about what is happening in your life. Contact Relationship and Family Counsellor Catherine at happy2day@iprimus.com.au or stop by and visit at TaiLongevity Studio on Facebook.